Dictionary - The Best Gift Ever

The Idea:

One day, I helped the Director in my workplace to clean up the storage room. And there it was laying in one of the shelves. A lonely dictionary. Who need a dictionary when you can search the translation in Internet? So, I adopt this dictionary and put it in my desk. I only used it like twice, lol. Anyway, one day, I stared at the dictionary and decided to make a story based on it...Read below!

The Story:

What is the best gift you ever get? Hm? Me? The dictionary from my grandpa! It was the thickest book I ever and will have, especially with everything seems to turns to ebook.

Anywaaaaay, do you want to know why this Webster's New Worlds dictionary can be the best gift? Let me tell you....keep this as a secret! It because it helped me in sooo many ways!

Look, I don't talk any BS. For start, It is good for a step to get something quite high. Right? It's thick! And....it absolutely help me kill insects, bugs and spiders. Oo

oh how much I love see their flatten bloody body! Well, those are the obvious and common, but this book really helped me!

Listen this, no kidding, but this dictionary stopped my older brother from bullying me. How? Well, believe it or not, when he cornered me to a cupboard, this book jumped and hit his head. Made a hole all through his brain! And now, he's disabled and stays on his wheel chair all day! Ha!

Oh, I have another one! When my girlfriend dumped me because I've been stealing from her, she didn't know that I have put over a million dollar in that dictionary! She sold all my stuff but returned the book. She said, "Hope you can find and understand the word #*$$+&! Cuz that's what you are!" Hahaha...Who need 16 T-shirts if you get a million dollar for free??!

What? You don't believe me?! Hey! I'm telling you the tru....Oh! You want to know why I bring this book here...Oh! No! I won't hit you with it, it's too valuable for me! Sorry for that, I thought that you...well, do you know this word? Here! Look here! No, you don't, right? Well, now we know...the meaning is right over....here. See? Now we know! So, what we need to know next is that, will you still be alive when it's done! Because I'm sooo curious for the next word: Flay. Oooh, fancy! Don't you see how good a dictionary is? We even only reach letter F ?!